15 Jan It’s all about the big picture (but in the big picture are tiny details)
I know we’re all different so what works for me might not always work for you.
But that being said, I’ve learned over the years that I’m not alone in my struggles, and that many of us have far more in common than we often realise.
So today’s post is sharing something that’s helped me … and I hope it might help some of you also.
I frequently get far too upset far too often by little things. They’re not completely unimportant little things, and it’s OK to get upset about many of them, but the way my mind works unfortunately turns too many 2 or 3 or 4 out of 10’s into 8 or 9 or even 10 out of 10s!
That is, things that should upset me a little bit upset me a lot, and for a long time.
There are many reasons for this but one of them is that I tend to catasrophise (making mountains out of molehills) and overgeneralise (thing that one bad thing means everything is bad). If that weren’t enough, I too often forget that even when something is bad, it won’t be bad forever.
As a result, something that maybe should cause me distress for a few minutes or hours, can bring me down for days and days!
Which is not good; especially when beyond these day to day problems, my life is bloody good!
Which brings me to the first point of this post – if / when I’m able to see the bigger picture, I can invariably feel better and more resilient. That is, when I can focus MORE on “how good is my life overall?” compared to “how am I feeling right now?” I tend to cope much better, enjoy more positive emotions like happiness, and limit the extent to which depression and anxiety overwhelm me.
The flip side of this is that I can, at the same time, overlook or discount some of the little things that happen throughout my day, especially some of the good and positive things.
So, at the risk of contradicting myself, although there are undoubtedly benefits to staying focused on the big picture, for that resilient type of happiness, there are also benefits to being mindful of and to savouring the little things, to being grateful for all that’s going well, no matter how big or small.
Savouring and the practice of gratitude are key contributors to happiness and wellbeing so … I guess the conclusion is balance!
Happiness is finding that sweet spot between longer term perspective and positivity in the here and now. I’m well aware this is easier said than done, but I’m also well aware that it’s possible, and it’s possible to get better with practice, and that if it’s possible, and if it will allow for more happiness and joy in my life, then it’s worth the effort and I’ll keep striving!