06 Sep An alternative to positivity
If that headline caught your attention then let be begin by being crystal clear … certain types of positivity are fantastic.
Happiness could be defined as a positive emotion; and happiness is undoubtedly associated with a myriad of other, fantastic emotions and outcomes. Happy people are healthier, they tend to perform better at work, they have better quality relationships and, I could go on, but in short, happiness doesn’t just feel good it’s very good for you!
Optimism and hope are also forms of positivity. And in the same way as I’ve just noted with happiness, optimism and. hope are also associated with many other great constructs. They tend to contribute to positive emotions, not surprisingly, but also to grit and resilience; so they don’t just help us enjoy the good times but they help us effectively navigate the difficult times.
There are many other forms of positivity but one about which I have some concerns is positivity of thought. Now again, when done right, positive thinking can be great. Optimism can even be considered as a form of positive thinking. But real optimism has one important differentiating factor, and that is that it’s grounded in reality. Optimists do see the good, but they also see the not so good and face up to these cold hard realities, looking, then, for solutions.
Which is what I want this post to be about. What if you were to focus a bit less on being positive and a bit more on being real. Real includes positivity, but also a realistic solution focus. Rather than aiming for positive thinking, what if we were to aim for HELPFUL thinking. Asking yourself something like “is this helpful?” or “is this constructive?” can be very powerful.
And most importantly, it avoids the trap of unrealistic positivity which can lead to frustration and disappointment!