19 Jun Sometimes it’s OK
More often than not I encourage people to do the best they can to choose self-care and self-help options that will be helpful in the long run, not just the easier options that might provide some benefit now, but will do little or nothing later and might even make things worse.
I’m referring to avoidance and distraction, alcohol or eating, anything that might provide some short-term relief but in the long-term, just exacerbates and/or maintains the problem.
Typically it’s better to do what’s right, which is not always what’s easy.
That being said, doing what’s right isn’t, by definition, always easy. In fact, it’s often very hard. And so, if we’re practising self-compassion, as we should, and being kind and gentle to ourselves, as we should, then there are days when we need to allow ourselves to just …
… do nothing, deal with nothing, talk to no one, face up to no problems.
There are days when it’s OK not to be OK and as such, when we just allow ourselves to feel shitty and hopeless and overwhelmed and more.
But, and this is an important “but”, it’s vital that these days don’t become weeks or more! Allowing ourselves some time out shouldn’t extend too long.
How long?
Well, that’s up to you. But if you can put a time limit on your allowable wallowing, and make a commitment to return to coping and functioning and dealing with whatever shit you have do deal with, then all’s OK. And that’s what’s needed for this slightly unhealthy approach to be OK.