23 Jan Don’t let the seemingly “urgent” override what’s really “important”
We live in a world dominated by the seemingly “urgent”.
When an email arrives, a notification “pings”, a demand is made, we expect ourselves to respond immediately!
But just because everything CAN happen so fast, doesn’t mean it has to; or should.
Faster is not always better. In fact, faster can be a massive distraction. We often feel good in the short term that we’ve done something, but in the long term we’re often left questioning whether that something was really the best thing.
A useful distinction can be made between the urgent and the important.
Urgent things cry out for a response; ASAP! When a colleague makes a request, a partner or child demands your attention, when any number of digital alarms light up your screen.
Urgent alerts seem to say … I NEED YOU RIGHT NOW?
But the question too few of us ask too rarely is … do you really?
Sometimes the answer will be “yes”. There’s no doubt there will be, at times, situations that need a speedy response. But there’s also no doubt that many, very possibly MOST of those demands are not really urgent and can, in fact, wait until some later time or date (which might be minutes or hours or days later, depending on the situation, but it’s still later).
“Important” issues on the other hand are far less demanding. We don’t NEED to exercise right now, we don’t NEED to call that friend in this moment, we don’t NEED to meditate or practice self care or show love or … there are so many things that would add massive value to our lives, that are key contributors to real and meaningful happiness and wellbeing, but which can easily be postponed or put off because there are no real or serious consequences to putting them off.
Why is any of this important?
Because research and experience shows that those who’re able to prioritise the important over the urgent, not withstanding the need for flexibility and for, on occasion, addressing something urgent, are happier and more successful. Those people I’ve met and worked with who really enjoy happiness and who really live “good” lives make time for, much more often and with much more discipline, the important aspects of life despite their lack of urgency.
So, give this some thought. Take a look at your to-do lists and your calendars and take some time, some real time because this is important (!) to assess which of the activities that takes up your time are really important versus those that are seemingly urgent but which in reality, could be delayed or delegated or possibly, not even done at all! Once you’re clear(er) on this, do your best to put these IMPORTANT tasks into your (new) calendar / list and make a commitment to stick to them as best you can.
It might take time and practice, and it might take some effort to set stronger boundaries and to be more assertive but … I can guarantee that if you value happiness and wellbeing then it’ll definitely be worth it.