03 Oct Be wary of even some of the best advice!
It might not surprise you to read that I read a lot of articles (and books) about mental health and happiness (and a whole bunch of related topics).
And there are a few people who regularly produce some great thoughts and suggestions, about happiness and health, one of whom is Arthur C Brooks who has a regular column in The Atlantic.
Recently, for example, he wrote THIS GREAT PIECE that includes some very useful advice, advice I’d be more than happy to recommend and endorse such as:
- avoiding pessimism
- steering clear of social comparison
- admire rather than envy
- keep (healthily) busy
- face up to your fears
- practice gratitude over guilt
- don’t play the victim
- and care a little less about what others think
Again, as already noted, there’s little (or nothing) in there I wouldn’t be happy recommending. Except for one thing; and that one thing is a pretty important thing because it’s in the title of the article, standing out loud and proud.
The title is, “Eight Ways To Banish Misery”, and therein lies my problem. I honestly don’t think we can BANISH misery. Misery is a normal part of life. And I think Brooks would almost certainly agree with this.
But once again, here’s the thing. Headlines are often designed to get your attention; and to do so, they’re often extreme and sensational. Although one could write this off as just wordplay or semantics it can also be much more than this. And it can set people up for failure or send them down the wrong path.
Distress, whatever you might call it, can not be “banished” or “eliminated” and shouldn’t be “fought” or “smashed”!
Although we do want to manage distress, and work towards more happiness, part of this involves acceptance.
Language is important. Expectations are important. So even in the best articles or books or presentations or anything, be careful of what’s being advised or suggested.