06 Sep Emotions Don’t Have To Spiral Out Of Control—Here’s How To Reel It In, According To Experts
Not surprisingly, we’re all about being happy here at The Happiness Institute.
At the same time, however, we’re also all about being real.
And so, it’s important to reiterate, that no one is or should expect to be happy all the time.
It’s OK not to be OK.
We can strive for happiness as much as possible, but we can also have realistic expectations.
Part of all this involves acceptance, acceptance not of happiness and unhappiness, but of all the various emotions, pleasant and unpleasant we’ll experience.
But acceptance doesn’t mean giving in; it doesn’t mean we just let stuff happen. And so, next time you’re negative emotions seem to be spiralling out of control, try these tips and strategies …
via Mind Body Green by Sarah Regan
Emotions are a fundamental part of our lives, for better and for worse. We tend not to have a problem with more “positive” emotions like relief, joy, and hope, but when it comes to the more “negative” ones, like grief, insecurity, and anger, we’re quick to push them away.
But pushing those emotions away never got anyone very far—and usually just end up exploding out sometime in the future. Here’s how to avoid that from happening by learning to control your emotions when they arise, according to experts.
1.
Learn how to identify emotions
Before we even get into how to control emotions, we first have to learn to identify them in the first place—which can be tricky. Especially if we’re used to immediately checking out when emotions get heightened, it can be difficult to understand what you’re actually feeling and what’s happening in your body.
As psychologist and licensed counselor Elizabeth Fedrick, Ph.D., LPC notes, “Emotions are specifically defined by the combination of these three elements: a unique internal experience, which often leads to a physiological response, and then ultimately a behavioral reaction.”
Try using the emotion wheel to identify what you’re specifically experiencing. From there, as therapist Genesis Espinoza, LMFT, recommends, “Notice what you are feeling. Allow yourself to feel your feelings. Notice the physical sensations in your body (i.e., pressure on chest, stomachache, headache), then identify whether you are experiencing a primary or secondary emotion.”
For example, you feel angry, which would be the primary emotion, but when you dig deeper, you realize you’re actually feeling hurt, which would be secondary. (Check out our guide to the emotion wheel for more info.)
… keep reading the full & original article HERE