6 Ways to Stop Self-Sabotage

6 Ways to Stop Self-Sabotage

We all want happiness and a good life.

And many of us take positive action to enjoy happiness and a good life.

But, at the same time, many of us also undermine ourselves with unhelpful, self-defeating behaviours that self-sabotage even the most positive of our efforts!

But there is hope; and with hope comes the prospect of more happiness …

via Psychology Today by Tchiki Davis

We’ve all been there: buying a gym membership with the goal of exercising more often and then never using it or planning to start an assignment early but then postponing it until the very last minute. You might even ask yourself why you keep doing this. If you feel trapped in patterns that keep repeating themselves even though you’d like for more positive outcomes to happen, you might be experiencing self-sabotage.

Self-sabotage happens when your actions or thoughts hold you back from accomplishing what you want. Sometimes, you do this without even realizing it. But when you sabotage yourself, the behavior and thought patterns you engage in create obstacles in achieving your goals.

Sometimes, you might be aware of your self-sabotaging behavior—for example, when you procrastinate on an important task or don’t stick to a plan after making commitments. Other times, self-sabotage can look less clear.

For example, you might create distance between yourself and your partner after an intimate moment, maybe after they said, “I love you.” In this example, you may be unconsciously preparing in case the relationship doesn’t work but you may also be self-sabotaging a potentially successful relationship (Peel & Caltabiano, 2021).

Although self-sabotage can lead to negative outcomes, it actually starts as a protective mechanism to keep us safe from any potential danger or harm. For our minds, what is familiar is considered safe, so any attempt to let go of the familiar and embrace the unfamiliar might trigger self-sabotaging mechanisms.

How to Stop Self-Sabotage

Self-sabotage is the brain’s way of telling you that you are about to leave what’s familiar and go toward what’s unfamiliar. And this is normal: your brain is just trying to keep you safe.

However, this might stand in the way of achieving your goals. So to stop self-sabotaging, it can be helpful to become more aware of your triggers and practice being more comfortable with the unfamiliar. Here are some tips to explore …

… keep reading the full & original article HERE