Self-Talk Secrets for More Happiness

Self-Talk Secrets for More Happiness

What you say to yourself matters.

In fact, what you say to yourself really matters, especially when it comes to mental health and happiness.

But it’s not just as simple as thinking “happy thoughts” or repeating “positive affirmations”. For real and meaningful happiness and other valuable positive emotions, read on for some real tips …

via Psychology Today by David Fessell


  • Slowing down to notice your self-talk and bring curiosity pays big dividends.
  • Sometimes self-talk comes from inner parts that haven’t been updated on your current life.
  • Exploring and updating your self-talk is “gold” for personal growth.

You’re making a quick breakfast on your way out the door, anticipating a busy day at work. Then you notice a bitter smell—and see smoke rising from the toaster. What’s your reaction?

Is it, “Oh no! This shouldn’t happen!” That inner voice is known as “self-talk.” It can be brutal or kind and everything in between.

Self-Talk Tips That Help

The good news is this: You can shape your self-talk in ways that serve you. The first step is awareness—noticing that inner voice. Is it helping you or adding to your distress?

If you notice a harsh inner voice, consider saying to yourself: “Ah, a part of me is feeling critical. It wants me to have breakfast and be on time for work. In a way, it’s trying to take care of me and protect me.”

Recognizing that it’s a part of you bringing a critical voice—not all of you—makes room for other parts, including ones that say, “It’s not a catastrophe, it’s just a burned piece of toast.”

Attuning to your self-talk, and the various aspects (or parts) of yourself it suggests, is an approach from Internal Family Systems. Developed by Richard Schwartz, Ph.D., and others, it can help bring more kindness and care to your self-talk. Doing so can help you navigate the ups and downs of life with more ease and success.

Bringing Curiosity to Your Self-Talk

At times, we all have critical self-talk—a voice that is pushy, demanding, and impatient…

… keep reading the full & original article HERE