An easy way to connect with yourself.

An easy way to connect with yourself.

“Know thyself” is an adage that’s been recommended for hundreds of years now.

From poets to philosophers, and more recently to self-help advocates, increasing self-awareness has been suggested as a way to increase happiness and life satisfaction.

And for good reason.

Without self-awareness, it could be argued, there can be nothing or little else. So if you’d like to learn more about how to boost your happiness and wellbeing via connecting more with your real self then …

via Psychology Today by David Fessell


  • Internal Family Systems is an evidence-based therapy that works with a person’s internal parts.
  • Finding and focusing on their internal parts can help a person understand themselves.
  • Increased self-understanding brings greater feelings of happiness and ease.
Tim Robberts/Getty

Source: Tim Robberts/Getty

Co-authored with Joel Klepac, licensed marriage and family therapist

Would you like more happiness, clarity, and self-connection? A simple strategy can help. Check in now with how you’re feeling. See if you can notice a specific emotion. Maybe you’re feeling frustrated. Or perhaps sad, or lonely. Then add these five words as a prefix to the feeling: “A part of me feels frustrated,” or, “A part of me feels sad.” Now give yourself a minute to check in and see what you notice.

These five words can start a helpful shift. It’s a process of emotional unblending, as Richard Schwartz and others in the field of Internal Family Systems (IFS) have discovered. And it brings many benefits.

On a recent solo beach vacation, I noticed a heaviness in my body and a longing for connection—that sticky feeling known as loneliness. When I realized that a part of me felt lonely—not all of me—a surge of relief and energy arose. It expanded in waves as I biked along the beach, an inner spaciousness echoing into the vastness of the ocean and softness of the sky. It’s a moment I never want to forget.

The shift from “all of me feels” to “a part of me feels” brings many gifts, including a larger perspective. For me, it brought access to new ideas for connecting with others and with my environment. Adding these five words to the emotion you’re feeling can bring an inner spaciousness and access to a deeper self that is calm, energized, and curious.

Finding and Focusing on Parts

The language of “parts,” as in “A part of me feels _____,” is invaluable. Seeing that it’s a part of you that feels a certain way naturally makes room for other parts and other perspectives. Not being fused with that specific feeling, while bringing curiosity and compassion to it, opens a world of possibilities…

… keep reading the full & original article HERE