09 Feb 8 Signs You’re Doing Well In Life
via Thrive Global by Michel Lian
It’s not easy to feel ‘successful’ these days.
We’re expected to do more, be more and have more than ever, and this obsession with ‘more’ can often seem to have no limits.
In Singapore (which I live next door to and visit pretty often), success has, for decades meant achieving the 5 Cs — the cash, car, credit card, condo and country club membership. These have since started making way for a new line-up of Cs, but either way, I wouldn’t say they’re unique to Singapore and are basically the Asian equivalent of keeping up with the Joneses in the West.
Do most people actually accumulate enough cash to acquire these societal milestones without going heavily into debt? Sadly, no — certainly not in Singapore and not in the U.S either.
And are these markers of success realistic? Not for the majority of people grinding it out to make ends meet as the cost of living keeps rising.
So how do you ‘feel’ successful without defining your worth in terms of dollar signs, the things you own or what you do for a living?
This is something I’ve been grappling with since I started taking a series of sabbaticals that’ve lasted anything from a couple of months to two years in-between full-time gigs.
When I’m not ensconced in the ‘busy-ness’ of a full-time job, how do I measure my success as a person?
When I am working, what does it actually mean to be successful?
TAKE OFF YOUR COMPARISON-TINTED GLASSES
Your markers of success will inevitably be tinted by comparisons that we tend to make between ourselves and everyone else, as well as unsolicited comparisons that come our way.
While there’s nothing wrong with stacking yourself up against the traditional standards of personal and professional accomplishments, what you truly want may not be what everyone else wants, and guess what? That’s completely OK.
Personally, I’m beginning to find the unnecessary stresses that comes with trying to fit into a rigid cookie cutter mould unbearable as I get older.
And whenever I manage to talk myself into believing that aspiring to check the standard boxes will automatically set me up to win, I end up realising that:
- Having more money will make me happier than not having enough of it (just ask anyone who’s barely able to make ends meet), but up to a certain point and not for long. It also won’t solve all my problems. In some instances, it can create new ones.
- I’ll be allowing someone else to dictate how I spend my money just to keep up, and I’ll be spending it on stuff that I don’t care about.
- And let’s be real: I can love my job, but it’s not going to love me back — anyone with a job can be replaced in the blink of an eye. Anyone. Even the CEO.
If I’m able to check all the boxes but aren’t happy, am I really successful? And once all these typical markers of success are stripped away from my identity, what’s left?
THE NEW MARKERS OF SUCCESS
If you’ve been wondering the same thing, here are 8 healthier and much saner ways to consider measuring your success as a human being.
1. You have a healthy relationship with money.
You work hard for your money, but you also recognise that it’s not the only thing you work for. You see money as a means to an end, not the end goal.
When you spend your money, you do it with intention and purpose instead of mindlessly. And you most definitely don’t spend your money to keep up with anyone who seems to have more than you.
As a result, even if you’re not pulling in a substantial income, you’re still able to save and invest for your future while also making the most of your present.
2. You’re doing work that you find purposeful.
Not everyone is lucky enough to have a high-paying job that brings them joy and makes them feel like they’re fulfilling their purpose in life, so if you’re one of the fortunate few, you’ve hit the work-life jackpot.
But even if you’re not working at your dream job, you find a way to bring meaning into your day by being of service to others during your 9-5 or outside of it….
… keep reading the full & original article HERE