14 Jan How to Create a Sense of Possibility
via Psychology Today by Tonya Lester
Several years back, a friend relocated from New York City to Portland, Oregon, with her young family. They left for all the reasons everyone moves from NYC—reasons like a chance to own a house with a yard and to have a more reasonable cost of living. On a visit back, a group of us went to dinner, and someone asked if there was anything she missed about NYC. After a pause, she said, “I miss the feeling that I could walk out the door and anything could happen. It felt like something magical could fall into my lap.”
That excitement and sense of possibility are probably why 90 percent of transplants move to NYC in the first place, myself included. But feeling a sense of possibility is not just linked with living in a big city—it’s also associated with youth, a time when serendipity, igniting hope, and fulfilling your potential feels almost inevitable.
Looking around the table that night, we were all deep in the grind of work and family. Not one of us was walking out the door each morning, thinking something magical might happen no matter where we lived.
After a certain age, does it start to feel like life’s surprises are usually bad ones? And if so, is there a way to fight that Groundhog Day feeling when so many of life’s big decisions are settled? There is. Here are three ways to infuse your life with growth, adventure, and awe, no matter what life stage you’re in or how old you are.
1. Learning/growth
According to positive psychologist and author of The How of Happiness, Sonja Lyubomirsky: “Find a happy person, and you will find a project.” This concept is so reliable for me and many of my clients that we regularly brainstorm projects in autumn to combat the predictable doldrums of the winter months. Having a project, which might be anything from renovating your home to learning flamenco, gives structure to our days and encourages our brains to think in productive, forward-thinking ways.
Find something you want to occupy your mind in the coming months. Our brains crave learning and growth. Pick a project that both invigorates and motivates you—moves your life in the direction you want to go. You’ll know you hit on something good if you feel a little thrill just imagining it. Expanding your identity by expanding what you’re capable of has a powerful effect on your self-esteem and sense of agency in your life…
… keep reading the full & original article HERE