22 Apr Let go of self-doubt and embrace, instead, real happiness!
There's no doubt we all doubt…ourselves!
Self-doubt is as common pretending we don't self-doubt but all jokes aside, it's an insidious detraction from lasting happiness and living a good life.
So for those of us who want to enjoy more happiness, tackling self-doubt is a serious issue; which is why I'm happy to share this article here with you today…
by Jessica Blanchard from Tiny Buddha
“It’s never too late, or in my case too early, to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit. Start whenever you want. You can change or stay the same.” ~F. Scott Fitzgerald
Have you ever let your doubts get in the way of feeling happy?
I have.
I left my soul-sucking corporate job to live my dream, teaching yoga in Thailand.
I was the happiest woman on earth—or was I?
It looked that way from the outside. But each time I opened my mouth to teach a class, I was mired in self-doubt. Why wasn’t I charismatic, funny, or charming?
I stumbled over my words. I wanted to be as chatty and charming as the retreat center owner, but I’m naturally quiet and thoughtful, more of an introvert. I secretly wished I could morph myself into a sparkling extrovert.
Have you ever felt like you had to be more like someone else in order to be successful? As if your own natural voice wasn’t good enough? That’s how I felt.
And I wondered if I’d made a gigantic mistake in pursuing my passion for teaching yoga.
My wise Indian teacher noticed and asked me why I worried. He told me to stop comparing myself to others and focus instead on what gifts I had to offer.
It was hard. I still harbored doubts. But as I faced my doubts, the clouds cleared from my mind and allowed the sun to shine.
I was empowered to teach from my heart, with compassion and honesty. And I strongly connected with the students.
Ten years later, I continue to practice and teach, and I live each day energized, happier, and fulfilled.
I’ve managed to keep my doubts at bay and achieve lasting happiness by following a collection of simple methods.
Your Cheat Sheet To Finding Enduring Happiness
1. Downsize your doubts.
Many of your doubts are irrational fears that you must expose for what they are. You can do so by breathing deeply and then carefully reconsidering.
Doubts can trigger your stress response, putting you into fight-or-flight mode. You’ll feel anxious and panicky, and your anxiety can stop you from following your deeper intuitions.
When you stop and breathe deeply, you put yourself back into rest-and-digest mode. You allow yourself to discern what’s real from what’s imagined.
For years I’ve thought of offering a teacher training course, but I’ve been stopped cold in my tracks by my fears. Am I a good enough teacher? Do I have the skills?
Then I stop, I take a few breaths, and I think, “I’ve been practicing and teaching yoga for more than fifteen years, and taken multiple trips to India to study with the masters. I’m qualified.”
I’m still scared, but if I listen to my doubts I’ll never take a step closer to this dream. So I take a few breaths, accepting and acknowledging my fears without letting them derail my initiative.
With practice, you’ll develop a deep-breathing habit that dispels irrational doubts. Just stop. Inhale. Exhale. And repeat three times.
2. Stop trying to make everyone else happy.
Do you feel personally responsible for other people’s happiness? If you do, when things don’t go well, their frown will add to your self-doubt. Lighten up your load, and don’t automatically assume that you need to make them smile.
I remember someone who looked for wrong in everything I did. She was deeply unhappy, and I was the target for her internal strife.
I tried to make her happy and I inadvertently took responsibility for her happiness. When I finally accepted that her unhappiness wasn’t up to me, I quit wasting my energy and questioning my self-worth. And that was a relief.
Want to feel happier and more confident? Let go of your need to be a people pleaser. Take responsibility for your own inner world, and quit trying to control everyone else’s…
…keep reading the full & original article HERE