08 Apr Are you very self-critical? Try these 4 steps to start loving yourself more!
via Chloe Brotheridge from Tiny Buddha
“You have been criticizing yourself for years, and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.” ~Louise L. Hay
I used to give myself quite a hard time. I felt like I wasn’t measuring up or doing enough or achieving as much as my peers.
I decided to make a note of the way I was speaking to myself and treating myself. What I found surprised me.
I noticed that I’d berate myself for days if something didn’t go exactly to plan, convinced that there was something wrong with me and that was why I had messed up.
I’d tell myself that I was stupid, useless, and a thoroughly incompetent, unworthy human being. Pretty mean stuff, really!
I wouldn’t even speak to my worst enemy that way I was speaking to myself. It was time to make a change.
Are you at war with yourself?
It’s been said many times that a lack of self-love is at the root of all of our problems, and I agree.
Our addictive behaviors are so often interlinked with self-esteem issues, not feeling good enough or valuing our own worth. At times, food or drugs may be a way of self-medicating or even self-harming.
If we’re stressed or anxious, we’re putting too much pressure on ourselves, telling ourselves that things should be a certain way—that we need to be different or try harder. We’re not accepting ourselves and the situation as it is right now.
When we take good care of ourselves, nurture ourselves, and accept ourselves completely, stresses seem more manageable, healthy choices are natural, and we feel better within ourselves.
Many of us think we need to be harsh and critical of ourselves in order to progress and move forward. However, evidence suggests that harsh criticism is actually demotivating and stressful, not helpful.
If you’re sick of being at war with yourself and are ready to love yourself more and become calmer, happier, and healthier, try these four steps.
1. Speak to yourself as you’d speak to someone you love and want to encourage.
Would you tell them that they’re no good? Would you give them a hard time? I don’t think so.
Tune into how you’re speaking to yourself throughout the day. Once you become aware of a harsh tone, work on changing this to a tone that is patient, compassionate, and accepting.
Giving yourself a hard time isn’t effective at helping you to do your best. I like to remind myself that I’m doing my best, that every experience is a learning experience, and that I’m already good enough…
…keep reading the remainder of this very important and helpful article HERE