7 reasons why we shouldn’t care what others think about us!

7 reasons why we shouldn’t care what others think about us!

As human beings we're complex animals. We are, in part, biological beings but we're also cognitive, spiritual and, among many other things, social animals. 

Along with being social animals comes a need to fit in with the "herd" or "tribe" or these days…the "gang". This is normal and adaptive, as without the group we'd not have survived, and it brings with it many benefits such as a sense of connectedness and belonging. 

At the same time, however, almost all things have good and bad aspects and there are, in this situation too, some drawbacks to being social animals and to wanting to fit in. For many of us, concern about what others think can cause all manner of distress and worry and pain and suffering. In some cases, these thoughts and especially concern about negative evaluation can cause significant levels of anxiety and depression. 

So today I'm happy to bring to you 7 reasons why you shouldn't care what others think (although in balance, it should be noted, that it is "normal" to care a little; as long as this "care" is not causing significant distress): 

  1. they're usually only judging you on external variables (such as clothes and appearance) and the opinion of someone who's judgement is so superficial shouldn't really matter

  2. the people that know you really well will know you really well and if they don't like you then the fact is they don't like "YOU" 

  3. you can't expect to be liked by all the people all the time

  4. it's healthier and far better for your happiness and wellbeing to BE the real YOU and be liked by a few than to try to be someone else and be liked by more people for being someone you're not

  5. even if you do succeed in winning over the opinion of others by being something you're not the distress you'll experience due to living a life that's incongruent with your values and strengths will negate any possible gains you might have enjoyed

  6. how many people do you really want to impress? If you have one person who truly loves you for who you are then the rest should barely matter! 

  7. you can't control other people's thoughts about you anyway; you can only do what you can do to live a good and decent life! 

As always, I'm sure there are many more than these 7 reasons for not caring what others think; do you have any others? Why should we not focus so much on other people's opinions of us? Please share your thoughts and comments HERE on The Happiness Institute's Facebook Page. Thanks in advance…