The biggest obstacles to happiness

The biggest obstacles to happiness

Check out my guest post (about, of course, happiness) on Here’s a sample…

When I talk to and work with women in particular, they seem to struggle mostly with the challenge posed by caring for others and caring for themselves. The eternal question of the aspiring super-woman seems to be _ã–how can I look after the needs of everyone around me _ã_ partner, friends, kids, parents, boss, employees as well as myself and have a life?_ã

This is where my butterfly comes in; a Buddhist Nun friend of mine once explained that they (practising Buddhists that is) think about happiness as being like a butterfly with two wings. One wing is wisdom and the other wing is compassion. Now after a long and fascinating discussion with my friend I came to understand that wisdom represents an understanding of oneself and one_ã_s own needs, whereas compassion represented an attitude of caring for and being loving and kind to others.

In short, the butterfly cannot fly and, therefore, cannot survive without both wings in good working order. We all, undoubtedly, need to look after ourselves. No one can be a good mother or wife or friend or anything for that matter if they_ã_re sick and tired and miserable. But at the same time, if all one does is look after oneself then that_ã_s selfishness, not happiness.

So balance self-care with care and love for others and you have real and meaningful happiness (the butterfly_ã_s flight). But how does this work in the _ã–real world_ã? There_ã_s no doubt it_ã_s challenging but here are a few things to keep in mind_ã_

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