08 Nov Lessons from losing in gambling to winning in life
Quite rightly, we often look to “winners” and to those who’re “happy” to learn lessons about success and happiness.
There are very good reasons for this and I’d very much encourage you to try or to continue this approach.
At the same time, however, we can learn about winning from those who lose; and we can learn about happiness from those who’re unhappy (even if it’s about what NOT to do).
But let me start at the beginning …
There’s an assumption in the title of this post that’s deserving of some attention; and that assumption is that gamblers lose.
This is, in fact, more than an assumption. It’s a fact proven by much research (and maybe for some of you, experience). The fact is, most people who gamble regularly lose. But they keep gambling.
Why would they do this?
Well, books and academic articles in the thousands have been written on this topic and so not surprisingly, the answer is complex. But it’s also simple. Especially if we look at one of the more common forms of gambling, playing poker machines or what the Americans call slot machines.
In short, even though most people mostly lose, they keep playing because … they also keep winning.
They don’t actually win, at least not in the end, but they have regular “near wins” and what the designers of these machines call “losses disguised as wins”. These are when someone bets a dollar, and “wins” 50 cents. In reality it’s a loss of 50 cents but most people don’t see it like that. They see it as a 50 cent win.
Now, before I go much further, I want to make it clear that this article isn’t really about gambling. It’s about what we can learn from gambling. And in that example I just provided there’s a valuable lesson for happiness, and for life.
And that lesson is … we could all benefit from creating more and more frequent small wins in our lives (even if over the long term we’re ultimately losing).
Too many of us focus too much on what we hope will be BIG wins. But if we can set ourselves up for SMALL wins, each day or even multiple times each day then just like the gambler will keep on gambling, we can make it so we keep on living and keep on persisting with, well, with whatever we’re aiming to achieve.
If this makes sense to you, then start planning pleasant and satisfying events into our weeks, our days, our hours. Savour those tiny moments of joy and happiness; reflect on them. And use the energy you gain to keep striving towards a better and happier life!